Look Fear In The Face

The time had come for us to take our youngest son Jake to LA for his fall semester at Emerson College. He needed to take his car for this particular campus which meant a 33 hour road trip! I’m not much on long car rides and I don’t like to sit for long periods of time, so my family went to work on me.  I realized if I was going to go on a long trip that I would want to be able to write, study, surf the Internet, and basically be entertained, as my husband would say. I  had decided I wanted an IPad Pro with phone service for the trip and to use in my studio, and would just make a small payment monthly. The Sunday before our scheduled roadtrip my husband decided I had to have the best deal so he took me in search of a new Ipad PRO.  We only had an hour to get it accomplished before the stores were closing. When we got to the store they didn’t actually have what I thought I was looking for and pretty soon after that realization, I discovered my husband wasn’t even looking at IPads but had started talking to the phone guy. I was starting to get discouraged, it didn’t look like I was going to have an new tablet for the trip. I started mentally reconciling that perhaps my old IPad with an added hotspot would suffice.  Before I knew it my hubby was finished with the phone guy. Crazy as it would seem, I actually ended up with better than I expected, an IPAD PRO, A 7-Plus Iphone, and a Hotspot, and the best part was it totally free and no payment. I think I’ll take Mr. Mitchell along more often when I need a bargain.

I drive a hard bargain myself, the other part of going along on the trip was I wanted to visit the Grand Canyon. I have taken so many trips nearby and I had never seen it. My friend had just gone on the Grand Canyon Sky Walk and it looked pretty cool, so we decided we would all stop on the way to LA. Knowing nothing about the Grand Canyon we didn’t realize that the skywalk would be on the other side, so we stopped and explored the first part of the canyon. The trails whet my appetite for more, they were gorgeous. Although I am afraid of heights, there were plenty of guardrails to make me feel secure. We spent the night after a full day of exploring at the Canyon Lodge and drove on to the skywalk the next day. We had no idea the Grand Canyon was so huge and that it spans so many miles.

When we arrived at our destination the skywalk seemed like it was going to be pretty expensive for all of us to go, but I pushed on, because we had come all this way. We weren’t sure if we wanted to pay the hefty price quoted by the sales lady. I felt like well we’ve come all this way and I have always wanted to go here. How are we going to feel if we pass this chance to see the skywalk up?

I decided I was going to go and let my husband and son know if it was worth the price. I got into the line and found out that the price had been misquoted… ha ha and it was totally affordable. Yay, we were all going to go on the skywalk together. We didn’t come all this way just to go away with regret.

Here is where the twist of the story comes; my son rushed out onto the skywalk no problem, my husband took a little time, but not much, then the person that wanted this so bad couldn’t even take one step onto the glass… Me! I am deathly afraid of heights and walking onto that glass floor and knowing that I was directly over the middle of the canyon stopped me in my tracks. I reasoned with myself, “You know you’re always telling everyone, what you want is on the other side of fear.” Linda”. The other side of myself said “This is perfectly good ground why would I want to leave it?” I even asked the guide if they had earthquakes she said “Yes all the time!” That was a big help. LOL My husband Tracy is a structural engineer and he said the structure was perfectly fine. Quickly, I decided if they had a earthquake, I would probably die anyway so I might as well enjoy the view. The reasoning went back and forth like that: The thought that finally won out was; I just kept thinking about you can reach new heights if you don’t push past your fears and I didn’t want to go home not having done what I pushed so hard for, because of fear.

I decided I was going to at least scoot myself out for the picture taken you see at the top of this page with my family, so I did. Then I went back, mustered up the courage and made up my mind I was going to walk the entire skywalk, slowly but surely I made it to the other side.  Once I arrived, I had to take a break before going back to the starting point.  It had taken a lot  to overcome the fear I had since childhood. I took a rest and went back to the beginning.  Now for the big finale. They say if you expose yourself to your fears you will get over them and I think they are right. My finale was I laid my face pressed down on the glass looking to the bottom of the canyon. Sweet success! Next, I wanted to look all over the canyon and I did without fear, but it was time for us to go on to the next destination on our bus ride. I can see why they saved the other part of the skywalk trip for last. I literally would not have been climbing up to the peak of the mountains and standing on top of the canyon if I had not pushed past my fear on the skywalk. I think life is a lot like that. You can’t enjoy the journey and reach new heights, if you don’t push past your fears. Everyone feels fear, it’s those that take action even though they may feel fear, that arrive at new heights. With my newfound faith my husband even got worried because I was getting braver and braver climbing to the top and getting too close to the edge of the canyon he thought. I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would get that close to the edge or climb to the top.

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When we got to the end of our journey and dropped our son off at Emerson LA, I was ready for my next set of hurdles to overcome. I had decided I wanted my husband and I to go on the infamous Hollywood hike. I looked it up online for directions and realized after reading the hike info, that it was possible we could encounter mountain lions, rattlesnakes, and bears… On my. I set my alarm that evening to get up early to beat the heat, but during the night I had nightmares about encountering the animals. So when it was time to get up, I hit snooze. Mama didn’t raise no dummy! I wasn’t going to be a mountain lion’s breakfast. No, but seriously, when we eventually  got up that morning, the reasoning was going on in my head back and forth again such as; Children and dogs and people are going on this hike. I’m pretty sure if the Hollywood Hills hike was that dangerous it wouldn’t have so many participants. You love hiking, you don’t want to miss it and so forth. You got it, I finally pushed past my fears and decided we were going to go. Of course as soon as we arrived, we came onto the sign that said “Caution wildlife habitat dangerous animals may be present including mountain lions and rattlesnakes. For info call park ranger.”

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As we decided to walk on, I literally saw a little dog and thought, “oh my gosh, lion bait”. I’m not gonna lie, I did stay away from the brush and keep my eyes peeled for all of the animals that we may come across. The journey was well worth it. We had such a great time, in fact, the Hollywood hike was the best part of the trip. What I discovered is, exposing yourself to what your afraid of makes you stronger! Then the next time you go to do something you’re afraid of, you will remind yourself I can do this! The view is best at the TOP! So when you feel fear remember that during your biggest trials, tribulations, struggles, or any battles that you may be facing that the best way to push past fear is with FAITH!

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